Order allows us to explore and take risks

Order is natural. Having a sense of order in one’s life is different for different people. It is essential to be spontaneous and take healthy risks in life.

Order requires discipline. Order creates structure. Parents create structure for their children so they feel safe enough to explore life. The same is true of ourselves. Order creates an anchor so we feel secure enough in ourselves to explore. We can venture beyond the experiences that we can control. We can expose ourselves and be vulnerable.

Order creates a channel for our strength can go forth from the inside. It allows us to trust ourselves and find confidence.

The opposite of order is chaos or random events. Chaos makes it difficult for us to count on anything. Counting on the things that are reliable gives us a foundation to go into the unknown. A launch pad. A base camp.

So what creates order for you? Is is straightening your desk or your house. Is is meditation, yoga, Tai chi, or exercise to create order in your mind and body? Is it is journaling to get closure with your day? Maybe it’s catching up with friend to feel like your relationships are intact.

Creating order might be a s simple completing an experience by thanking someone that helped you. My teacher to call this not leaving any “dangling participles.” It was his way to say tying up loose ends. Loose ends leave things unresolved and waste emotional energy. Getting closure and completion with experiences allow us to create order so we can be present and available in new experiences.

So taking life seriously means having order in our life. It allows us to be at our best when it counts most.

The inquisitive mind wants to know

The inquisitive mind is that part of us that is curious and open to learning. It has no preconceptions about the experience in front of it. Its only intention is to know what is there. It is the mind of a child. It is born of innocence.

It is the inquisitive mind that gets into things. It is full of passion. It creates the sparkle in your eye. It is playful and mischievous. It is truly interested in what people are saying. It asks questions when someone is explaining something and really wants to understand what they mean. It wants to know what life feels like to that person. It is pure discovery.

When the inquisitive is present, people feel heard. They experience that you care about them and what they are saying. By genuinely wanting to know about them, you are demonstrating that you care.

The inquisitive mind is teachable. It helps us learn from every experience that we have. It is the spirit of exploration. It helps “empty our cup” (see previous blog)- so we can experience what is there. It is non-attachment of Buddhism. It is the mother of invention- and innovation. It always creates excellence.

So do what ever it takes to awaken the inquisitive mind that resides in you. Some people play with their kids. Some meditate. Others create things. I say, “I am nothing; I know nothing” (see other previous blog) when entering an experience. Your inquisitive mind will help you find the awe and splendor in things. It will help you feel alive.

Besides… the inquisitive mind creates the only truly pure intention- the intention of: “I want to know.” It has no agenda. It could be: I want to know…what is there. Or: I want to know…what it is like. Or it could be: I want to know…who you are.

Next chapter of your “sense of purpose”

You have raised your children. They have moved out; your nest is empty. Continuing to parent them just seems to annoy them. Your purpose for the past twenty years has been raising kid(s) and/or having a family. Now there is travel and plenty of fun things to do, but what is your purpose? Work is somewhat meaningful, but surely you must be destined for something beyond your job description.

We all need a sense of purpose. It gives our life meaning. We have all come here for a reason- not just to take up space. The Hindus and Buddhists call this your “Dharma”- the thing you came here to do. A French saying calls it your raison d’etre (reason for being).

Raising children has been part of this purpose. But what about the second half of your life. Forty-something is young these days. You likely still have a lot of life in front of you. You have a lot to offer. And…

The world is a mess. We have economic, energy, health care, and environmental crises happening- simultaneously. There are going to be revolutions and new paradigms. The world is changing faster and faster. With these changes there will be casualties and people left behind.

So long story short, the world desperately needs you and you need a sense of purpose. Sounds like a match made in heaven.

To discover your sense of purpose, I recommend exploring things that you are drawn to, things you have a passion for. It has to come from inside. You have natural gifts and talents. You experience at some unique and valuable things. These are clues. With your talents and experience there is something that you would be perfect at- something you are born to do?

We often discover (or rediscover) our dharma through remembering. After you have been exploring for a while, you see or hear something and it triggers a memory… “When I was younger I always wanted to help pregnant teenagers. Then I got married and had kids and I never got to it.” Well… now you can get to it.

Your dream or purpose is not time limited. God/Spirit/Creation has no sense of time. It just cares that we do it. Are you going to do it?