Common ground

Aug 11th, 2011No Comments

Our culture trains us to compare ourselves to other people. We measure ourselves in relation to others. So when you compare two brands at the grocery store- do you look at what is the same or what is different? You look at what is different, right, so you can buy the better item.

So what do we do when we meet other people? Often, we compare the things that are different in each other. We differentiate ourselves from the other. Developmentally speaking, this is essential in post-adolescence in order to differentiate ourselves from our parents. But how many of us continue to differentiate ourselves from each other as adults. It may be out of habit or maybe we just never learned another way to relate. And, it is not nearly as useful as an adult- it causes us to focus on the things that are different.

Why not change our lens to focus on what we what have in common with people? We may be different- but focus on the common ground between us. Common experiences. Common phases in life. Common values- even if our beliefs are really different. Maybe we both value integrity, honesty, and treating people kindly- but have different religions, for instance.

Once we have common ground, we can learn from the differences in each other. We get value understanding how other people see things. It gives us the strength and wisdom of diversity.

To change the world, we are going to have to join with and trust people that are different. Hanging out with just people that seem to be like us will not be enough. We need to connect with people that are different and stand on common ground.

It is cool concept now- but in the not too distant future, we may need to find common ground with people in order to survive.

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About author:

Michael Hoffman’s passion is guiding people to connect with their natural gifts. He believes that we all have innate gifts that hugely benefit others and the world when we offer them. The purest example of these gifts is the Native American concept of medicine or the gift you offer your people. Michael defines your medicine or gift as the natural effect you have on other people when your heart is open. Unfortunately, the demands of our current culture to comply and fit in often distract people away from their inherent gifts and the natural expression of their being. Michael believes many of us have forgotten our dreams and what we are about. This sadly results in a loss of purpose, passion, and vitality. As an innate gift specialist, Michael offers retreats, classes, and individual sessions to allow people to reclaim their natural gifts. These venues allow people to identify, awaken, and offer their gifts. This experiential work incorporates Zen thought, Native American ceremony, rites-of-passage, and releasing limiting belief systems. Michael also maintains his meta blog to provide knowledge, skills, and awareness for unfolding your natural gifts. He is currently compiling this knowledge and research into a college class and book. Michael earned his Bachelor of Science in Psychology in 1987 and Master of Social Work in 1996. He is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. In addition to his formal education, Michael studied and apprenticed with a Zen Master and spiritual teacher for 22 years to learn how to guide people to understand themselves. He has worked with people professionally since 1986 as a psychotherapist and teacher. Michael currently resides in Oceanside, California.

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