Holidays a big deal at the emotional level

Dec 16th, 2010No Comments

Like it or not- at the emotional level, the holidays and birthdays are a big deal.

Have you ever said to yourself, “What is the big deal? Christmas Eve or my birthday is just another day.” And then spent it by yourself or in some “business as usual” fashion. And then got hit with this wall of emotion. Often it is sadness about being alone or not with people that are able to make it special for you.

So this year prepare. Think about where you want to be. I recommend being with the people that are most important to you. And think about what type of celebration will meet your emotional needs. Even if you say Christmas it is all about the kids or about family. There is some little thing that makes the holiday special for you. Find it.

And then make sure you celebrate it. Do not blow it off. This is no time to be a martyr. You are a human being. You have emotional needs. I guarantee some of them are correlated with the holidays.

Maybe it is a tradition that you like to celebrate. Or maybe it is time to create a new tradition- with a new family or new significant other. Now is the time to think about it and plan it.

Or maybe now is the time to adjust your plans. Does sleeping in twin beds at your in-laws on Christmas Eve really work for you?  Money sent on a motel room can be worth its weight in gold at times like this. Your significant other may say, “But it will hurt their feelings if we don’t stay with them.”

Simply say, “Yeah, but it will hurt my feelings if we do.” Whose life is it anyway?

About author:

Michael Hoffman’s passion is guiding people to connect with their natural gifts. He believes that we all have innate gifts that hugely benefit others and the world when we offer them. The purest example of these gifts is the Native American concept of medicine or the gift you offer your people. Michael defines your medicine or gift as the natural effect you have on other people when your heart is open. Unfortunately, the demands of our current culture to comply and fit in often distract people away from their inherent gifts and the natural expression of their being. Michael believes many of us have forgotten our dreams and what we are about. This sadly results in a loss of purpose, passion, and vitality. As an innate gift specialist, Michael offers retreats, classes, and individual sessions to allow people to reclaim their natural gifts. These venues allow people to identify, awaken, and offer their gifts. This experiential work incorporates Zen thought, Native American ceremony, rites-of-passage, and releasing limiting belief systems. Michael also maintains his meta blog to provide knowledge, skills, and awareness for unfolding your natural gifts. He is currently compiling this knowledge and research into a college class and book. Michael earned his Bachelor of Science in Psychology in 1987 and Master of Social Work in 1996. He is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. In addition to his formal education, Michael studied and apprenticed with a Zen Master and spiritual teacher for 22 years to learn how to guide people to understand themselves. He has worked with people professionally since 1986 as a psychotherapist and teacher. Michael currently resides in Oceanside, California.

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