Love, hate- You choose.

Oct 29th, 2010No Comments

You may have heard that love and hate are not opposite emotions- but actually quite close. They both represent a high level of caring and involvement. The opposite of love is more like indifference or not caring.

Bart Anderson, Zen Master, took it a step further. He stressed that emotions and their seeming opposites (like love and hate) are actually the same emotion. That they are the same intensity and are stimulated from the same place of love- a stimulus for movement. How we translate that emotion is all in context to the way it was perceived.

So you are in love. Then you perceive that you have been betrayed. That feeling quickly flips to hate.

Or if your child tells you they hate you when you do not give them what they want- don’t freak out. Realize they love you- but are reflecting it into hate at that moment. If you accept it and do not react, they move through it rather quickly.

Bart Anderson also taught that we ultimately make the choice on which way how we reflect this emotion. Sure we may have belief systems and or behavioral patterns affect our perception and seem to make this choice for us. But if we add a little awareness and diligence into the mix, we can have a free choice.

So the next time you find yourself hating someone, remind yourself that you care a great deal for this person. Consider whether this is the best course of action. Hate can become love. Judgment can become acceptance. Resentment can become forgiveness.

Fear can become courage. Indifference can become passion. Boredom can become curiosity and inquisitiveness. Self-pity can become get over it.

So how do you choose to feel? Loving someone sure does beat the alternative. It likely will be a lot harder, though.

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About author:

Michael Hoffman’s passion is guiding people to connect with their natural gifts. He believes that we all have innate gifts that hugely benefit others and the world when we offer them. The purest example of these gifts is the Native American concept of medicine or the gift you offer your people. Michael defines your medicine or gift as the natural effect you have on other people when your heart is open. Unfortunately, the demands of our current culture to comply and fit in often distract people away from their inherent gifts and the natural expression of their being. Michael believes many of us have forgotten our dreams and what we are about. This sadly results in a loss of purpose, passion, and vitality. As an innate gift specialist, Michael offers retreats, classes, and individual sessions to allow people to reclaim their natural gifts. These venues allow people to identify, awaken, and offer their gifts. This experiential work incorporates Zen thought, Native American ceremony, rites-of-passage, and releasing limiting belief systems. Michael also maintains his meta blog to provide knowledge, skills, and awareness for unfolding your natural gifts. He is currently compiling this knowledge and research into a college class and book. Michael earned his Bachelor of Science in Psychology in 1987 and Master of Social Work in 1996. He is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. In addition to his formal education, Michael studied and apprenticed with a Zen Master and spiritual teacher for 22 years to learn how to guide people to understand themselves. He has worked with people professionally since 1986 as a psychotherapist and teacher. Michael currently resides in Oceanside, California.

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